Dating in general is hard work. Do you swipe right or left? Does the woman offer to pay for her half? Do you meet for drinks or try to arrange for dinner? It’s complicated, it’s messy and who honestly has time for all the back and forth.
Dating when you’re a doctor is even more complicated. With the lack of free time, too many hours, too much stress, and not enough energy, dating is hard.
How do you work hard, date smart and live your best life?
Tinder recently released an article naming the 'most desirable' job titles in online dating with a doctor being #4 (if you’re a man) and as for female? Well, according to Tinder, if you are a female doctor, it’s not even considered.
So what are you supposed to do? Quit your job so you can date? That doesn’t seem logical. Yes, life is hectic when you’re working your way to the top. Trying to find time to date while getting your career in order can be a whole other ballgame you just don’t have the time to waste on just anyone.
“Dating smart” is an essential tool, any successful professional needs to utilize to ensure you’re meeting the right match for your busy lifestyle, and someone who understands that drive to get to the top. You also have to factor in all those social aspects; looks, drive, work ethic, taste in music. Can you imagine if you were a die-hard Beatles fan and your new partner hated them. Talk about deal breaker.
Being a busy professional likely means outsourcing areas of your life to other professionals - whether that includes hiring a personal assistant to handle all your personal life tasks, cleaning service to keep things tidy, or a matchmaker for your love life. Those individuals are important and vital to keeping you sane, but not the only solution to your dating issues.
There are other ways to ensure that you’re getting maximum value from your minimal free time.
An online article Notable Life, outlines the ways busy career-climbers can “date smart” while still maintaining a healthy work/love/life balance without having to give up one for the other.
Yes, doctors I’m talking to you. Even with working 60+ weeks, you can still find your Happily Ever After.
- Hire a Local Matchmaking Service: Dating apps and online dating require even more of a workload than you already have. This is essentially a part-time job: weeding through profiles, chatting aimlessly with people that likely end up going nowhere, and wasting time meeting the wrong people who were sent to you via a computerized algorithm. Hiring a professional matchmaking company will ensure that you receive the quality you’re looking for; not simply random dates with little potential for a romantic future.
- Use the Date-Night-In to Your Advantage: If you work long hours, it’s fair to say you might be too tired to take your date out sometimes. Of course, this depends on the night and it depends on how you’re feeling. You may be in the mood to simply put your feet up at home rather than go out. A date-night-in is fine as long as you still put some effort in to show that you care enough not to become one of those lazy daters.
- Use Your Lunch Break to Go on Dates: At least once per week, forgo sushi with Alex from accounting and instead go on a lunch date. This works especially well if you meet someone who works the same core hours as you do, and works close to your office. You have to eat lunch anyway, so you may as well make a date out of it. It’s also a great way to (hopefully) brighten your day before it’s even half over.
- Choose a Partner Who Has a Similar Lifestyle: You must choose your partners wisely. If you tend to work 12 hour days, you probably don’t want to date the freelance writer who only works 6 hours a day. Chances are, if there’s a huge contrast between the amounts of free time you both have, problems could arise. That’s not to say you can’t still give it a try – but if he or she starts getting demanding of your time, that’s a red flag. Odds are, a relationship will work better with someone who is just as busy as you are. If you both get off work late, you’ll both be fine with going out for a late dinner or relaxing at home with late-night takeout. Similarly, if you both are working on side projects, you can order takeout and work on your respective projects while still spending time together.
- Steer Clear of the Overly Needy Types: The needy types often sweat the small stuff – which means they might not be cool with you canceling a dinner date due to working late. If things tend to come up last minute for you, you’ll need to date someone who skews more to the easy going side of things than the needy. If their life revolves around you, they’ll tend to get upset easily about a change in plans. However, if they have their own happy and busy life, they don’t need you as much – which is a good thing.
- Incorporate Your Partner into Your Work Life: Bring your significant other to work events, or ask him or her to come along when you have to go away for a weekend for a conference. Other ways of incorporating your partner into your work life include running ideas past your partner, getting work-related advice from your partner, and sharing career milestones with each other. If you’re busy, they can be busy with you too.
On top of those tips, knowing which social dating platform is best for you is important too!
- Tinder: This is where many start with online dating. You’re presented with a high volume of potential matches. If you and a potential match both like each other’s profiles, the app will connect you so you can start talking. While Tinder may have a reputation as a casual hookup app, it has led to some successful relationships.
- Bumble: If you’re a female doctor looking to take charge of your dating life, Bumble is the place for you. Once you make a match, it’s up to the woman to initiate conversation with those that they’re interested in. The men have 24 hours to respond if they are interested.
- OKCupid: This service uses surveys and questionnaires to create a profile for you, then presents potential dates with a score of how well they match your profile. OKCupid has recently become more like Tinder, adding a swipe left or swipe right feature. One difference is that you can send a message without a match.
- Hinge: Hinge operates like a lower-volume form of a swipe app, presenting you with a few matches daily that you can like or pass on. You can comment on a potential match’s picture or question prompt to show interest. If you like each other, the app connects you via a chat.
- Match.com: Match is one of the original online dating services. It’s also the first one on this list that requires a paid subscription. Match also uses questionnaires and surveys to identify date compatibility.
- Physician Focused: Physician Focused is a personal assistant service for physicians. With three membership tiers based on time needed, they help with everything from managing your to-do list, to planning trips, engagements and more. They take your stress away so you can do what you want; work more, date smarter or relax. You tell them what to do and they work for you.
What tips do you have for managing your busy work schedule with your personal life? Do you outsource things? Take time off? Hire a personal assistant? Tell us in the comments how you do it all.